Have you taken a non-judgmental look inside your heart and spirit to assess the traits that define the essence of who you are? Have you accepted all of those traits in a loving manner by embracing and recognizing the positive ones, and acknowledging the ones that need a little work?
Self-Awareness and Self-Love
Knowing who you are and loving who you are, are important factors for claiming the power within you that is rightfully yours. When you allow the negative words and actions of others to define you, you are giving other people the power to dim the light within you.
Determining the Reason behind Communications
There is a very big difference between someone providing you with constructive feedback and someone hurling insults and hurtful words at you. The clues to determining the difference are in the delivery and the motivation for the feedback.
Respect Comes Naturally
When people have your best interest at heart, they will speak to you in a respectful manner, and the thoughts they share with you come from the heart. The person who speaks with you in this manner is genuinely interested in your welfare, and would like to help you succeed.
It is Their Fear
On the opposite end of the spectrum, when people say vicious or mean things to you using sarcastic, biting, or angry tones, they are projecting their own negative feelings about themselves on you. The motivation for such behavior is based in fear. Often, it is because they envy what you possess and are afraid that they will never have it themselves. In this person’s mind, they mistakenly think that putting you down will raise themselves up. Instead of taking responsibility for themselves and their personal happiness, they lash out at you. When facing an onslaught such as this, you need to be strong enough in your own right in order to recognize the motivation behind this behavior, and to dismiss it as someone else’s fears and not a reflection of who you are.
How to Achieve the Best Results
In relationships and communications, it is love, self-love and love toward others, that creates the outcomes we desire. Coming from a place of fear or attempting to instill fear in others may temporarily achieve certain results; however, in the long-term, it eats away at the levels of trust and can ultimately destroy interpersonal relations.
What to Do
When you encounter people who are operating from a place of fear instead of love, you can choose to dismiss their comments and hurtful behavior and move on with your life. Whether it was a momentary transgression or a more problematic aspect of someone’s behavior, try to take a more understanding and compassionate approach by knowing that each person is doing their best to grapple with the issues that we contend with on earth. We all make mistakes, and, hopefully, we learn from them. Within your heart, mind, and soul, forgive the person for their transgression, and wish them love, health, and happiness.
Self-Worth Is Defined by You
All in all, when you love yourself for who you are and you operate from a standpoint of love, you can more easily recognize when someone’s behavior is motivated by his or her fears, and not genuine feedback that you should take to heart. Your self-worth is a value that is defined by you, and only you. The actions you take and the thoughts you share display to others the value you hold for yourself in your heart, mind, and spirit. Believe in you, and love who you are, because you are a beautiful light in this world who deserves an abundance of happiness and love.
With much love and many blessings for all,
Karen T. Hluchan
Spirit Medium, Motivational Speaker, Reiki Master, Spiritual Artist, & Author of How Have You Loved?